We spend a lot of time thinking about the best place to raise our children. For the last nine years we have lived in Ely, a small market town. Technically, it’s a city because it has a cathedral, but this is in name only. In reality, it’s a provincial market town: safe, quiet and predictable – all attributes which make it a perfect place for families to settle. But we have itchy feet.
We choose to come back here because we could only afford to buy a tiny flat in London, unless we moved a long way out. Living in London wasn’t really our long-term plan, although we did really like it. Well, I say ‘our’, really I should say ‘I’, in that James probably likes city life more than I do. Anyway, we were seduced by the idea of being able to afford a whole house with a garden, in a quiet-ish area with lots of trees and green spaces. London is an hour and ten minutes away by train – which sounds really good in theory, although in reality it’s actually quite a long commute when you factor in the extra travelling you have to do when you get to King’s Cross.
Anyway, we settled here, got jobs in the area and the years have slipped by. Everyone always says that Ely is a perfect place to raise children, and in many ways they’re right. Everything is within walking distance, which is great when you’ve got a baby in pram. There are lots and lots of cafes and tea rooms – again, great when you’ve got a baby. The shops offer a basic selection of things – everything you need, although if you want something fancy you need to go into Cambridge, half an hour away. Needless to say, there are too many charity shops.
Time for a change?
Now the children are getting a little older, I am starting to want something a little different – safe is beginning to look a little, well, boring. Living in a small town is beginning to lose its appeal and is feeling increasingly like a compromise – not as exciting as city, but not as pretty as the countryside.
Is city life more exciting?
Every time I visit Cambridge and other cities, I’m struck by how vibrant and exciting everything seems. It’s busy, yes, but the variety is really exciting. I can pop into an art gallery or museum with the children, actually go to a large shop which will stock what we need, or go for an interesting walk in the many green spaces. Sadly, we couldn’t afford more than a shoebox in Cambridge – which, after London, is one of the most expensive places to live in the country.
Ely is very convenient, but beyond the basics, it’s definitely lacking in excitement. Unless you want a cup of coffee, a browse in a charity shop and a trip to Waitrose – in which case it’s perfect! The sports and leisure facilities are somewhat lacking, and there isn’t a proper cinema. If we increasingly have to leave Ely to do things like see a film, or find an interesting club or activity, then is it really worth living here?
The dream of the rural idyll
This brings me on to my other reason for dissatisfaction – the pull of the countryside. If you live in a small town you have none of the benefits of a larger city, but you still have a lot of the downsides – street lights, traffic, noise and a lack of prettiness. This partly stems from our area of the country, which is rural but in quite an industrial way (lots of tractors thundering by). If you want things to get a bit prettier, you need to move to a well-chosen village or something even more off the beaten track. I would love my children to live in a more rural area, with a view and a bigger garden.
The main problem with moving to the country would be the chance that I’d actually hate it. I’m not a big fan of driving, and I’d really miss being able to walk everywhere. And would the children thank me when they’re teenagers if we moved to a place where they had to rely on us for transport? Ely has a fantastic railway station, from which you can get just about anywhere in the country. I can see this would be amazing for a teenager. I grew up in a small town with a shaky bus service. I’d have loved a railway station on my doorstep.
So, as you can see there are so many options – my head is buzzing with them. Far too many for just one blog post! Over the coming weeks I’d like to start a regular post about this – I hope it will help me decide what I want and it might help some you too!
What do you think – are you happy with where you live, or do you have itchy feet like me?
Jo Warde says
Hi Lizzie, lots of plus sides to Ely – coffees with me! Hopefully things will get more lively with the new cinema. Think what Ely really needs is an M & S or some kind of department store.
marmaladepie says
Coffees with you are definitely top of my list! An M&S would be so perfect wouldn’t it? Maybe one day…x
a touch of domesticity / katie sparrow says
The Peak District National Park border runs through our village, and yet we’re 45mins door-to-door from central Manchester. Can’t beat it for having a foot in both camps! I think that’s one of the advantages of living ‘oop north’ – proper, affordable rural living within easy reach of cities. At the moment we rarely take advantage of it, as our budget (stay at home mum, blah blah) doesn’t stretch to train journeys, but I dream of a future when the kids are at school and I’ll be able to just pop into Manchester for the day, visit some galleries, etc! Aim big!
marmaladepie says
I really, really envy you on this one – definitely the best of both worlds! There is a real lack of footpaths where we live, and it’s terribly flat. I love the Peak District. I too am looking forward to nipping off on the train more when both boys are at school 🙂
mummyofboygirltwins says
Same here. We are North Wales, quite rural and yet the nearest town is only 10 mins away. It isn’t amazing but it has enough. I love the countryside though. Recently we have been trying to find a new place to live and I am still being drawn to the countryside. Although I would still like something 10-15 mins away as I do love a good shop! Good luck deciding 🙂 Jess x
marmaladepie says
Thank you, Jess – I’m hoping these rambling blog posts I’m planning will help me make my mind up! It’s so tricky as it’s not particularly idyllic around here, but it is so incredibly convenient and easy! Good luck with your move x
Mummy Marbles says
It is a tough one – We moved from a huge vibrant city to semi rural. I still commute 3 days and feel like I have the best of both worlds. I actually feel my body relaxing when I drive home with nothing but green either side of me. .. I couldn’t do proper rural though. Oh – I too am surrounded by bloomin charity shops.. Grrrrrr !!!! x
marmaladepie says
I think I’d like the calm of getting away from the busyness of our town, but I’m just not sure if I’m ready for the inconvenience! x